Yesterday I completed my first year of teaching. I was a difficult year, but I know for certain that everything worth having is worth the hard work.
I entered this journey of teaching and learning because I was afraid last year as a college senior of being rejected from law school. At the time I convinced myself that there are other ways to help people besides being a lawyer so, I created an avenue for myself to run away from what I feared and go towards something that I felt I could be successful at. I understood that there would be challenges because I was pretty sure that most people in the school district where I work, and the company that I work for had never encountered a differently-abled person like myself.
My suspicion was true, the organization and the district where flabbergasted to say the least. I was the crucial missing piece to the puzzle that was missing from this next phase of my life. Up until this point I had only been around like minded individuals in a collegiate setting, so I had no problem getting my point across and getting things done, but as an official adult with her official first full time job it was not the challenges that initially frightened me but it was the impact or the impression I could make on the students I was blessed to be teaching.
I was afraid because once again in my life, I was the only one. I began to doubt what I knew to be true about myself and loose faith in the person that I KNOW GOD made me to be. I knew for a fact that I would never be able to get my eleventh grade reading retake students to take me--a very young, very petite, very optimistic, differently-abled renaissance woman seriously. In true fashion, everything happens for a reason. I did struggle. I did fail--several times, but I also persevered and remained teachable. Along the way my students made tremendous gains and so did I. Many of my students met their goal this school year, but I too met a goal that I DID NOT EVEN KNOW existed.
I wanted my students to embrace the idea of having grit and tenacity. I also wanted them to not be afraid of their greatness but to embrace it, and lastly I wanted them to understand that a person's circumstance does not define their potential for success. The point I am trying to make is that internally I was a hypocrite. I started this journey because I was afraid to embrace my greatness. As a follower of the christian faith, I believe that I was put in this space to take somethings away that I lacked-- true assertiveness, courage, and confidence. In this reflective space I realized that I have indeed internalized those attributes and I thank God for this experience, and I pray for piece as HE continues to lead me on this journey called life. I am no longer afraid because I KNOW GOD IS FAITHFUL...
I entered this journey of teaching and learning because I was afraid last year as a college senior of being rejected from law school. At the time I convinced myself that there are other ways to help people besides being a lawyer so, I created an avenue for myself to run away from what I feared and go towards something that I felt I could be successful at. I understood that there would be challenges because I was pretty sure that most people in the school district where I work, and the company that I work for had never encountered a differently-abled person like myself.
My suspicion was true, the organization and the district where flabbergasted to say the least. I was the crucial missing piece to the puzzle that was missing from this next phase of my life. Up until this point I had only been around like minded individuals in a collegiate setting, so I had no problem getting my point across and getting things done, but as an official adult with her official first full time job it was not the challenges that initially frightened me but it was the impact or the impression I could make on the students I was blessed to be teaching.
I was afraid because once again in my life, I was the only one. I began to doubt what I knew to be true about myself and loose faith in the person that I KNOW GOD made me to be. I knew for a fact that I would never be able to get my eleventh grade reading retake students to take me--a very young, very petite, very optimistic, differently-abled renaissance woman seriously. In true fashion, everything happens for a reason. I did struggle. I did fail--several times, but I also persevered and remained teachable. Along the way my students made tremendous gains and so did I. Many of my students met their goal this school year, but I too met a goal that I DID NOT EVEN KNOW existed.
I wanted my students to embrace the idea of having grit and tenacity. I also wanted them to not be afraid of their greatness but to embrace it, and lastly I wanted them to understand that a person's circumstance does not define their potential for success. The point I am trying to make is that internally I was a hypocrite. I started this journey because I was afraid to embrace my greatness. As a follower of the christian faith, I believe that I was put in this space to take somethings away that I lacked-- true assertiveness, courage, and confidence. In this reflective space I realized that I have indeed internalized those attributes and I thank God for this experience, and I pray for piece as HE continues to lead me on this journey called life. I am no longer afraid because I KNOW GOD IS FAITHFUL...
Comments
Post a Comment